Florida (rewrite)

“Seriously, mom. It'd be good for you.” her daughter said.

“I don't want to go to Florida. I refuse!” Olivia replied.

“I worry about you up there, mom. You're not getting any younger, and there isn't anyone up there if you get hurt.”

“So come up here, then! I refuse to associate with those hideous casino people.”

One Must Fall 2097 (MS-DOS)

I optimized the scoring system for fighting games. Tell me what you think.

The Main Menu. The music will get stuck in your head.

One Must Fall 2097 was my introduction to the fighting game genre, and it left one hell of an impression. To this day, I still hold it as one of the best fighting games I've played. Also, it is about giant robots beating each other up, and it is awesome.

No way to dodge this

“It was almost midnight, I think. I was shopping for groceries, and I had just parked my car under the streetlamp when I was ambushed by a local gang. I've lived in this neighborhood for ten years, so I know how to handle some punks trying to pull shit, you know?

One of them shouted to me as he walked towards me. “Yo, big guy! Drop the bags, and no one gets hurt.”

To Huskily Bang (FanFic Review) (Mirror)

This review for the fanfiction, To Huskily Bang, by BlakDawn.

what the flying fuck was that you dumbshit moron.

motherfucker

This Review was written by Hunter31, and is not my own.
And now, a rebuttal:

I dunno.

As written by myself. Thank you, and good night.

The New Reading List, with EXTRAS

The Yiddish Policemen's Union, by Michael Chabon.
Grimm's Complete Fairy Tales, by The Brothers Grimm.
The Chronicles of Amber, volume 1, by Roger Zelazny.
The Chronicles of Amber, volume 2, by Roger Zelazny.
Trumps of Doom, by Roger Zelazny.
Blood of Amber, by Roger Zelazny.
Sign of Chaos, by Roger Zelazny. Or the whole series, with the last three books as they were originally published.
A History of Rome, by Cyril E. Robinson
The Grass Crown, by Colleen McCollough

A story from class, rewritten.

Based on one of the stories that resulted from a Dramatic Lit class.

     "Why won't you go to Florida again?" Jill asked her grandmother, "Last time was great."

     "No it wasn't." the grandmother, Diana, replied, "Everyone there was like me, aging, decrepit and wrinkled. I couldn't even get away from them doing what I liked to do. The casinos were full."

     Jill sighed over the phone. "You refused to spend time with us at the beach, that was your own problem."

     "Exactly. Leave it be." Diana said, pride clear in her tone.

     "Why won't you spend time with us?" Jill asked, "You always seem to complain about what happens, no matter where we live, and you never want to be with your kids."

     Diana spat out a glob of mucus. "I don't like feeling old." She began to cough.

     "Are you alright?" Jill asked, "do you need me to call something for you?"

     "NO!" Diana said. "I've just got a slight cold. It's wintertime."

     "Alright, if you say so. Call me back if you decide to change your mind, alright?" Jill asked, "we can pick you up if you want."

     "From New York City? HA!" Diana began to chuckle. "Talk to you later, Jill. Have fun."

     "I will. Love you, Mom." Jill replied.

The Review Formula!

I was requested to move this bit. I have to agree.

The Review system is essentially a list of Do's and Don'ts, here listed in full. Each Do/Don't has a respective value, for example, good pacing in gameplay earns 2 points. After all points have been awarded, they are added up, and that is the score.

Here's the list, with the meaning of each shown.

Graphics: -7 to +2
+1 Clear: The graphics make it very easy to distinguish everything for gameplay. There is never even the slightest hint that you don't know what something is, unless your eyesight is poor, or you don't have the background knowledge.
+1 Amazing: The game is so utterly beautiful that it's worth just watching as piece of art.
-1 Confusing Menus: The game's menus are hard to understand, and get in the way of playing the game.
-1 Poor enemy design: Enemies just look horrible.
-1 Poor protagonist design: The player just looks horrible.
-1 Indistinguishable Enemies: The enemies look the same, even when they attack very differently.
-1 Indistinct enemies: separating the enemies from the background becomes difficult.